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Glurg is tired. He wants a new island. Glurg has been waiting a long time for a bus that is not coming. Because there is no public transit on Glurg's Island.

Glurg's cousin, Blurg, is busy. Oh so busy with this and that, and nothing really. But lots of it, and so Blurg doesn't notice that she has no transit.

Glurg is going to figure out how to find a new island. Glurg is tired.

Where's Glurg when you need him?

Where is Glurg? Does anybody know?

We last saw Glurg sitting quietly by a river in the Mango forest. Peaceful, forlorn, whistfully mourning lost love, gleefully soaking up the mango juice, softly whimpering, thriving on the warmth of new love, and quietly meditating. Yes, Glurg was having a party of attitudes in his brain. Not exactly a roller coaster... More of a mini-putt.

The ideas and feelings start off moving in some direction, bounce off a wall, get distracted by some quirky hump in the landscape, tumble through a pipe in the darkness, and end up 270 degrees in the other direction and a level down.

And nothing changes. Glurg is there. Thoughts bouncing and bumbling on the artificial turf of the mind.

On a good day, Glurg watches the bouncing just as if it were perky colored balls on the mini-putt course. On a bad day... Glurg gets stuck in the tunnel of darkness not knowhing why he is rolling downhill and curving unexpectedly.

Stuck. That's the epitome of the darkness. Locked onto the careening balls and bouncing around wildly, forgetting to manage the trajectories of the mind. Mindlessly rolling and surprised by every bounce and bump in the turf.

Glurg, Glurg. GLURG!

Glurg, Glurg, Glurg

In the long days of wandering without direction, Glurg found himself.

Yes. Glurg was there in the sticky, dripping mango juice. He was there in the loneliness of the afternoon heat. He was there in the crowded forest. He was there in the silence of the full moon and in the babbling of the brook. It was all Glurg. He was home.

"All who wander are not lost."

Glurg. Continued...

Remember Glurg? The calm one by the river? OM?

Yeah. Glurg got a little bored and decided to get up and move around a bit. He gathered a rucksack full of mangos and began his mindful journey into the Forest of Confusion.

Yes, Glurg was confused. And he didn't even know it. That is how confused Glurg was. In the Forest of Confusion, it is hard to tell exactly where you are. The paths twist and climb and cross each other in three (or more) dimensions. Time and space are minimal constraints, as the paths diverge into various Realms of Consciousness, sometimes erupting in a totally OTHER consiousness. And hence, the Confusion.

With a capital C.

Glurg had vowed "No more initial caps in my life. No more Confusion. No more Guilt. No more Love. No more Relationships!!!" Glurg was full of exclamation marks!!!!

Yet here was the Forest of Confusion, loaded with initial caps and fuzzy logic. And Glurg was in it. With no clear way out.

Glurg wandered deliberately and mindfully, with NO clue where the path led. And reminisced on the wonderful freedom of it all. As he ate his mango, the juice ran down his chin and dripped on his toe, and he Laughed. With initial caps. Profound Zen Laughter.

And Glurg slurped his mango as he walked along the path through Consciousness and pondered the Meaning of Life wondering what would happen next.

Glurg Does Nothing

Glurg continued walking through the forest. He had no idea where he was going, and had no plans, no agenda, no action items, and no Blackberry beeping at him. He just wandered. When hungry, he ate some mangoes. Occasionally, a coconut fell out of the sky and clonked him on the head. He didn't obsess about the coconuts. He barely gave them any thought. Once he even caught the coconut, cracked it open, and enjoyed a refreshing drink.

Without a Strategic Plan, Glurg was reduced to simply making the best of every moment. He observed the little forest creatures. He studied the rocks at the base of the tree. He noticed some tiny flowers growing in the shade of the mango trees. Yes, he sat on a large stone, and he waited. Like his literary friend, Siddhartha, Glurg had learned to wait. He had few other skills, so waiting, walking, and eating occupied most of his day. And observing.

He sat long, and waited patiently, observing. And nothing more happened. He did nothing. No elaborate plot developments. He just waited in the midst of the universe, and let it wash over him. He began to hear the sound of OM coming from the stones.

Glurg in the Coconut Storm

Glurg walked innocently through the forest, noticing the feathery light filtering through the treetops. Ah, glorious light! He continued pondering, as he always does, while noticing mindfully the nuances of forest smells and sounds.

Glurg thought back to the distant past on the Coconut Island with Princess Coconut. Suddenly, a coconut fell from the sky and clonked him on the head! "How odd!", thought Glurg, noticing that he was walking through a mango forest, and there were no coconut trees to be found. Perhaps a crazy monkey threw one down. Glurg walked on.

Again, he thought wistfully of Princess Coconut. Instantly, he was pelted by TWO coconuts. Fearing a concussion, Glurg looked for shelter. Perhaps this was a magical revenge of Princess Coconut, angry with Glurg for leaving the island. Glurg continued walking, looking for a cave or other shelter. He wondered about the Princess, and her world, and again... coconuts fell from the sky in abundance, all smacking Glurg on the head. He ran and cried out "No more coconuts! Please! No more coconuts!"

He saw a rocky overhang, and crawled under there for shelter. He sat quietly, silencing the monkey in his mind, bringing his awareness to the numerous lumps on his head. With a peaceful equanimity, Glurg resolved not to think of Princess Coconut again, for each thought created pain and discomfort for him.

The river, now in the distance, continued to sing out "OM". Glurg smiled a friendly smile.

Reflections of Glurg

Glurg sat peacefully, listening to the all-encompassing OM of the river. Glurg reminisced. Glurg thought back to a very happy time, a time of delight, and pleasure, and intimacy, and sunshine. Glurg felt warm. Glurg wondered... "Why am I reminiscing on this memory?" ... Glurg became aware that he was reflecting on his reminiscing, and what an amazing entity the 'mind' is. .. He then observed that he was analyzing the reflection about his reminiscing, and thought he would lose his mind if he went any further down this strand of consciousness.

So, he returned to his pleasant memory. "Why is it important? Am I grasping a past that is over? What is the point of this past memory in the present NOW?" Glurg paused. He went back to that time, to see what it had to teach him.

Glurg realized that, in that happy time, he had met someone special... someone who could see the light and power inside him. Poor Glurg had been rather fatigued, in a deep cloud, and had lost sight of the light. In fact, Glurg had thought the light was burned out (it happens with age). But in that magical time, Glurg met a Goddess of Light who saw the light inside him, and reflected it back to him, and somehow, enabled Glurg to see that light in himself again. By this reflection, and new self-awareness, Glurg was transformed.

Reflecting back, Glurg was not clinging onto this moment. Glurg was re-learning, and honoring both himself, and his inspiration. Glurg hoped inside that, someday, he would be able to reflect the inner light to another being who had fallen into a cloud. Glurg was aware of how tenuous our sense of 'reality' is... how it can be muddled by cloudy thinking, unsupportive environment, any number of put-downs that make us believe we are incapable of various forms of greatness, or connection, or relationship.

Glurg held warm memories of the Goddess of Light. That Goddess brought new life into so many beings, every day. Glurg thanked his lucky stars that the Goddess had noticed him, had reflected his inner power, had allowed him to wake up, had given the gift of transformation.

Glurg listened to the murmur of OM from the river, and got up from his resting spot. Glurg walked down the forest path, knowing that he too was a Light Being, and could bring light to others he would meet along his path.

Glurg in the Forest

Glurg was confused. This was a new kind of forest. There were no coconut trees. No coconuts. No coconut Princess. He wandered aimlessly. Then, having recently read Siddhartha, he sat down near a river. He spent a lot of time sitting there and thinking, with no plot development whatsoever. He felt a little blue, kind of hungry, and a little lonely, and thinking maybe those coconuts were pretty good after all.

Then, plunk, something fell down and hit him on the noggin! "What strange gift is this from the Forest God?" The river said "OM", and was the same everywhere, yet never the same. Glurg spent some time pondering that while tossing this gift back and forth from hand to hand.

He had never seen such a thing, and thought perhaps it was useful for some type of athletic competition. But he did not have any team-mates, nor a rival team, so he just chomped into it, and was instantly covered with lucious, juicy, pulpy mess.

The taste. It was exquisite. It was sweet, juicy, lucious, and delicious. Better than anything he had ever eaten before. He devoured it, and stepped into the river to rinse the stickiness off his hands and face. The river continued to mumble "Om".

Glurg looked up. OMG, these treats were dangling everywhere! He was in the Incredible Mango Forest! Glurg did not want to be a glutton, but he loved those mangoes and ate two more. Then, he stepped into the river, and noticed that it wasn't the same river he had stepped in earlier.

Glurg sat on a stone and thought about that for quite a while.

Glurg's Big Adventure

Once upon a time, there was a hermit named Glurg. Glurg was on an island, and life wasn't too good. It wasn't too bad either, but Glurg just wasn't too happy. There were coconuts, (lots of coconuts) but nothing else to eat, and Glurg really wanted to get off that island. Glurg wanted to fly a kite, and jump on a trampoline, and make a stir fry. Glurg was sick of coconut.

One day, an amazing miracle (the best kind of all) occurred! Glurg was walking through the coconut forest, when, what to his wondering eyes should appear? A miniature sleigh? Eight tiny reindeer? NO.... A bridge.

Glurg saw a bridge that touched the island and reached out over the sea. A bridge. Oh my goodness, Glurg was beyond happy. He jumped right on that bridge. He loved that bridge. He hugged that bridge. He had thought he would never see a bridge, and he would NEVER get off that island, and all he would ever have for the rest of his life was coconuts. A bridge. Glurg hopped, and skipped, and jumped on the bridge... singing The Rainbow Song, because that's the only song he knew.

Glurg was happier than he had been in years. He sat on the bridge, climbed on the bridge, ran back and forth across the bridge. He even did cartwheels, which he thought he couldn't do anymore! He could just stay on the bridge FOREVER... that's how happy he was.

But there was no food on the bridge.

Glurg was getting a smidgeon hungry. He thought there might be a world with something other than coconuts, but he didn't know for sure, because he had never seen anything else. And he didn't even know where that bridge went. It was feeling a little scary.

The island was familiar, after all. Coconuts are kind of tasty. You can make almond joy ice cream, or coconut ambrosia with them. Maybe that wasn't so bad. Who knows... the bridge might just lead to a SWAMP, with nothing, not even coconuts. Boy, if it did, he would sure wish he was back on the island with the coconut trees! THEN, he would be sorry.

Glurg nearly turned back, when the next amazing miracle happened! Glurg had a dream. He dreamed of enchanted broccoli forests, and friendly folk who shared their trampolines, and a circus. Glurg had a burst of courage, and RAN across the bridge, even though he couldn't see the end. He ran because he didn't want to go back to the island, but he was a little scared, and he had to cross before he lost his courage. He chose the adventure, the unknown, the opportunity.

And, Glurg kept running across the bridge, over beautiful glistening water. Sunny and full of jumping fish and diving birds. Glurg ran through the wind and enjoyed getting his hair blown all over the place. Glurg got to the end of the bridge.

He didn't want to get off the bridge.

It had been so nice. So beautiful. So happy. The shining water, the diving birds, the cartwheels. He didn't want to leave all of that.

But he did. He jumped off the bridge. He felt SO sad because he loved that bridge. But he had to get on the land. And he did. As he looked back at the bridge, he felt so sad. It had been a beautiful time on the bridge. He would miss that glistening sea and salty breeze. He walked into the forest, and began a new life.

So, dear reader, please use the comment feature to answer any and/or all of the following questions.

a) Is this an allegory, metaphor, analogy, simile, onomotopoeia, fable, tale, or the true recitation of actual historical facts as channeled through this humble author?

b) What happens to Glurg in the forest?

c) Has Glurg crossed the Rubicon?

d) Do you have any advice for Glurg?